I'm struggling to move around, my arms aren't working, the chemo side effects are doing their thing and setting up a room shot is really hard, so taking some fine art style flower portraits can at least help me keep my hand in and give me some personal joy when I'm unable to do room styling.
I'm sorry that I've felt the need to share on instagram some bad experiences I've been having at the hospital. I have to be honest, and if my truth helps anyone to feel less alone, more prepared and better informed then it's job done. I've never wanted to be put in the situation where I have to talk about our precious NHS in a bad light, but you need to be prepared for your treatment to maybe not go smoothly, maybe not be well organised, maybe add to your stress and discomfort and for mistakes to be made.
So apart from this being a place to vent my opinions, I also want to share my experience of the Paxman cold cap and how I've been trying to hang on to some hair during chemo, and here again, I really don't want to illustrate that with photos of my head, so if you aren't interested in the cancer then perhaps just look at the pictures as a separate entity ...
Let's talk about the hair loss progression during chemotherapy. For the first (heavy duty) four rounds I really didn't loose very much hair at all, but towards the fourth round I did see some shedding but overall it didn't look too different. I limit the amount of times I wash it to maybe once a week as more hair does seem to come out when it's wet and you are trying to get the tangles out. I switched to very very mild shampoos (Burt's Bees do a nice one) and very intensive conditioners to stop it tangling (I tried Coco and Eve). Most recently I found a hairbrush (made by Manta) that was designed by a guy whose wife was having chemo. The hairbrush is available on Amazon and I think it's very good, I wish I'd had it from the start. Luckily I just happened to see a tv show about new inventions where he was talking about re-thinking the hairbrush and making it more flexible so that it doesn't pull the hair.
I stopped using permanent dye on my hair and switched to a wash-in one from Superdrug (just to tone down the new growth) and after a few months I trimmed a few inches off the ends so it doesn't tangle so much.
Weirdly the big hair loss seemed to come immediately after my operation, I have no idea why then, although a friend of mine who knows a lot about hair loss says that the anaesthetic sends a message to the hair follicle to shed and become dormant. Now my hair is about half it's thickness and very fine like baby hair, it's very fly-away and I'm trying to find something to deal with that, nothing discovered thus far but I can keep this updated if I find something great.
Whether my new soft fine thin hair is because I stopped using permanent dye, stopped using a hair dryer, or because its the result of the chemo on the hair follicle I'm not sure, maybe several contributing factors. I don't have any completely bald patches so the Paxman Cold Cap has at least left me with a fine even coverage that is no worse that just baby hair. Having this thinner type of hair is better than no hair at all and where the choice is this or be bald, I'm going to be thankful for small mercies.
As I only now have one more chemo to go I've bought some shampoos and conditioners that boost hair growth and see if these do anything at all. My head doesn't feel like my own, it's a very strange sensation. I wonder if these thickening shampoos will work, I can but try. I try not to rub it at all so I've also bought a silk cap to wear in bed at night but to be honest this didn't last long as it drove me bonkers.
A few people have suggested that taking gelatin and silica gel strengthens and thickens hair and that certain foods also help (high in protein). Interestingly my friend who has attended a clinic for hair loss, said that you should wash it daily so that the roots aren't clogged up. I think that perhaps there's more investigation to do once chemo is out of the way so that I can boost my hair re-growth and as I discover things that work I will update this blog post accordingly.
Many thanks everyone for your continued support. All photos on this blog are my own and must not be used without permission.
